Warm Weather Antagonization

With the onset of delicious, warm, summer weather, I've felt many things.  I've felt that exhilaration a lizard feels when sunning on a rock, that need to open up my petals like the flower lying dormant under the frost of winter, the freedom of my toes as they shed the winter trappings.  All of these things come with the onset of sunshine and warmth.  One thing I didn't anticipate feeling was frustration and anger toward my daughter's school. 

It came with the title, "Request for Parental Support/Dress Code." My oldest daughter is 13 years old.  She dresses comfortably, and I approve 100% of the clothing she wears.  I buy them for her, ergo she has my approval.  She wears tank tops when it is hot.  As do I.  The request began innocuously enough: a short discussion of the fact that her school had a dress code, and the outline of said dress code.  Some points of the code are fine.  Don't wear clothing that promotes drug or alcohol use, sexual innuendos or crude language.  Check.  Fine.  Don't wear headgear that isn't religious in nature.  Sure.  I don't really get why, but okay.  Don't wear halter, tank, thin strap and short "belly" tops.  Hold on.  Wait a second.  Who is this one directed to?  Think about that one for a moment.  This list goes on: sunglasses or distracting accessories, ripped and torn clothing (good luck with that one these days), pajamas and onesies, hats, toques and bandannas (spelled incorrectly, I might add).

This seems like a run-of-the-mill dress code for most schools, and workplaces.  Most of it, though I fail to see its relevance, is harmless.  The fact that my daughter is barred from wearing tank tops on hot days bothers me.  If I am okay sending her out the door in the morning in a tank top, don't you dare send her home or tell her to change.  Are her shoulders so offensive?  For that matter, are mine?  I wear sleeveless tops all the time.  My daughter took issue with this one as well.  In fact, she did a little experiment.  She and a male friend of hers both wore a tank top to school the same day.  The predictable ending:  she was chastised and he was not.  This is where I take exception - the double standard.  I am a teacher, and I would wear a sleeveless, or tank top, to work if it were hot.  I have done so on many occasions. 

Here's the kicker: "Educators are not Victorian prudes, and we did not enter our profession to be fashion police.  However, if required, we will ask our young people to put on more clothes.  If they refuse or if our requests are frequent, we will seek parent support, as we want to get on with the job of teaching and learning..." This is quoted word for word in the document sent to all parents.  Firstly, what must have prompted them to write something so tongue and cheek?  Secondly, how dare you address me, the parent, in that manner?  The blanket statement was obviously motivated by anger or frustration, and is dripping with animosity.  The email ends with talk of a cohesive relationship and thanking parents for their anticipated support.  Simply by using this type of rhetoric, they do not have my support.  I don't care how reasonable they appear to be, they are using language to get a rise out of people, and effectively pitting me against them. 

My support is not given on this one.  Not all of it.  When saying they will ask their young people to put on more clothes, who exactly is this directed toward?  Girls.  100% girls.  And this was backed up by evidence.  My daughter's male friend wearing a tank top was not asked to "put on more clothes," while my daughter was.  She owns no tank tops that show anything more than her shoulders, and they are in no way offensive, nor would they be if there were less material.  It is not the school's place to teach my daughter to hide her body, and be ashamed of her own skin.  It is not their place to tell her that her shoulders are offensive to the teaching and learning environment.  It is not their place to target the girls and not the boys when the warm weather comes along. 

So here's my rant.  This one has taken weeks of mulling around to be ready to put into words.  I know what it's like to teach in a junior high school.  I understand the challenges that come along with all of that.  The last thing a junior high school should do is intentionally antagonize the parents of their learners.  I feel antagonized.